Is it this much hard work for "normal" parents to become parents?
For Mark and I to become parents, even foster parents, the jumping through hoops is amazing, and somewhat tiresome.
We've had to fill out miles of paperwork. We've had to go through hours of training via both online and in person classes. There's fingerprinting. There's background checks. There's reference checks. There are medical exams and paperwork for our doctors to fill out. In the past, we've also had family reference checks. Hours long psychological evaluations. Meetings with psychiatrists (due to my being on psychiatric medicines). They check our insurances. They check our home. We had to install smoke alarms in every.single.room. Carbon Monoxide detectors on each level of the house. Fire extinguisher in kitchen. Mapped our safety escape route. Locks on cupboards. Plug in thingies in the electrical outlets. Adjust to the right water temperature in all faucets. The house temperature cannot be below 68 degrees. Crib must be non-lower (we had to buy a kit and fix our crib so the side doesn't go down). No bumper inside crib for children a year and under. No blankets or pillows in crib with baby. Correct five point harness car seat with correct expiration date printed on bottom. All vaccination records for all animals in the home.
Makes me wonder, if "normal" birth parents had to go through with all of the things listed above, and PASS all of the tests.....would there be as many "normal" birth parents out there with children?
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I am a foster parent and was given my first baby (now my adopted child) without any review. They walked in the front door, sat on the back porch for 15 minutes and let me take a special needs baby home from the hospital. This scared me! I am so thankful for the reviews that are being done on foster homes. These kids have a hard start, and need the best chance possible.
ReplyDeleteI always think it's sad that people who want a child so much have to go through so much.. Of course many people who do give birth themselves go through a lot but sometimes I just look at the people who seem to be able to get pregnant at the drop of a hat and not want the child or hurt it and think why is it this way. x
ReplyDeleteI WISH that "normal" parenthood had as many leaps and bounds to choreograph as what you're going through! Good luck and Godspeed in your adventure!
ReplyDeleteI'm with arg--I wish that EVERYONE wanting to be a parent had to go through all this. Some might finally get a clue about what parenting actually involves.
ReplyDeleteI have meet women who got pregnant, and then when they tried for baby number two it took 8 or 5 years lots of money, and doctor visits. But I also have a friend who had 9 miscarries before finding out her body can't hold a baby. And another friend who has been married for 10 years and has tried everything to get pregnant and nothing is working, her body won't ovulate. So everyone is different, and I strongly feel that there are reasons for everything, God will show us His master plan when he's ready. I'm sorry you have gone through this and hope that things improve for you.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with everything you guys are doing! Hugs!
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