WHY?
I don't understand why my little sister had to die.
I don't understand why our family had to go through that life-changing event on Nov. 29, 1979.
I don't understand why my friend Jill was murdered by her estranged husband.
I don't understand why my ex-husband needed to beat me.
I don't understand why my ex-husband treated me like shit for 12 years.
I don't understand why I had/have PCOS.
I don't understand why Mark isn't allowed to be a Dad when he'd be such a great Dad.
I don't understand why we were allowed to conceive three children only to have all three die.
I don't understand why I have panic attacks and social anxiety and OCD.
I don't understand why I had cancer, especially when no one in my family had cancer?
I don't understand why my father-in-law died from cardiac arrest when he had no heart issues.
I don't understand why 9/11 happened.
I don't understand how people can be so hateful.
I don't understand how someone can kill innocent children.
I don't understand why some people are allowed to be parents when they are undeserving of that roll.
I don't understand why, in the eyes of social services, family is always best.
I don't understand what goes through some peoples' heads.
I don't understand how "out of control masturbation" can be construed as a disability.
I don't understand people who can use abortion as birth control and be OKAY with that.
I don't understand what is going on in this world today.
I don't understand.
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I don't either hon...Noell
ReplyDeleteI don't know if anyone can understand the things you have listed. As crappy as it is, I think we sometimes have to just accept those things we cannot understand for continuing to search for reason when there is none will only cause more grief and sorrow.
ReplyDeleteI hate that any one would need to make a list like this, but I think there are certain things that we just aren't meant to understand. As human beings, if we knew how or why everything happened, there would be no discovery.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry. :( There are so many things in this world that no one can understand. I can kind of answer the anxiety one though! I suffer from anxiety and panic disorder, and my psych teacher once told me that some research indicates our brains are simply wired the same way they were when we were cavemen when it comes to the fight or flight response. Basically, we're like those who had to run from, say, sabertooth tigers, to survive. Now, that sounds insulting at first, right? I mean, I don't think I have a caveman brain! But my teacher (who also had anxiety disorder) also said it will make us more likely to survive in the face of a major tragedy. Sometimes, the only way to deal with it is to look on that little bright side. Like, if aliens invaded, our base survival instincts are stronger than those without anxiety issues. I'm not sure if that theory was ever proven, but it does make me feel better.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand those things either. I hope this post, and blogging in general, give you the strength to be mad, put things out there, and be stronger because of it.
ReplyDeleteWow...not sure what to say other than I'm sorry, especially about your personal troubles from the past. I hope you're moving on to a brighter future though! Maybe we'll see a future post about 'Things I Don't Understand Part II - Positives" :)
ReplyDeletehttp://theworldaccordingtomindi.blogspot.com/2013/04/things-i-dont-understand-ii-good-stuff.html
DeleteSo sorry to hear about all your personal losses... There are so many things in this life that no one understands, or ever will. It is all part of this world we all live in, it can be great and it can also be hell.
ReplyDeleteIts a very tragic life you have lead. Try to focus on the positive things. You beat cancer! You have Mark! Its hard but its true.
ReplyDelete