I guess I don't understand how someone could have someone they have intense hostility for in their lives?
When I was 11 years old, my little sister Kathy Jo (eight) and my older sister Lisa (13) and I were standing opposite our home, waiting for the school bus. A car came around the corner, slid on black ice, and landed on top of Lisa and Kathy Jo....and threw me across the street into our front yard. The car broke every bone in Kathy's body and she was killed.
That morning, before the accident, Kathy had finished the box of cereal that I wanted. How dare she? I guess I told her...."I hate you and wish you would just die". Yes, the words go through my head, even 34 years later. How can I forget? It might have been the last time I used that word in anger...or in any form.
Today has been a day and a half. One of those days that you just want to crawl back into bed, pull the covers over your head, and block out everything. I came THIS close to using that word as a description of today. And then I remember. And then I think of everyone who has it much worse off than Mark and I. We have each other. Some people don't even have that.
Don't hate.
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/hate
Definition of HATE
1
a : intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury
b : extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing hate
I agree..Life is way to short to waste energy on hate. Sorry you had a sucky day and hope it gets better!!
ReplyDeleteI agree..Life is way to short to waste energy on hate. Sorry you had a sucky day and hope it gets better!!
ReplyDeleteVery well said! I have learned {also as a hard lesson} not to use that word. I have found it difficult at times, but I have been able to stop myself with just a quick memory and a breath. I am so sorry for your loss, and hope that you give yourself a break- I am sure that even though you said that you didn't mean it, Kathy knew that too. Every day seems to bring its fair share of torment, whether it be a memory or something that happened that day, but also there are moments of happiness that makes things bearable.
ReplyDeleteHaving someone say Thank you to me seems to brighten my day. I have come to see through the years that some people do have blow after blow of bad luck, problems, and what-not. But keep remembering you have survived through it all and have been a beacon of hope to others that have been worse off. Thank you for sharing such intimate details of your life and for keeping faith in knowing that each day there is the possibility of things being better!